Life today rarely seems to slow down for even a moment. Deadlines, constant notifications and the eternal quiet pressure to prove we’re on top of things can all meld into a pulsing ball of stress. For many, the refuge of a drink after work, partying on the weekend, and even excessive scrolling can feel like letting off some steam. But what starts as a way of switching off can easily become the backdrop to your life.
The weight we carry
From a demanding career to family obligations, modern life expects us to keep switched on without taking a beat. Social media often amplifies this sense that everyone else is managing effortlessly, which adds to the pressure. Over time, that sense of needing to keep up can leave people reaching for shortcuts, solutions that numb the anxiety rather than really removing it.
Why the brain craves shortcuts
Stress activates the body’s survival system, flooding us with chemicals that trigger the “fight or flight” response. Dealing with that response is how we learn to mitigate stress, how we set our limits and find ways of growing. Substances like alcohol or drugs, or compulsive behaviors like spree shopping or gaming, can hijack the process. They calm the nervous system, subverting the impulse to fight or to flee, and for a time the problem seems to go away. But the relief is temporary, and its fuse grows shorter every time, which encourages repeated and heavier use.
We all have our comfort strategies. But on one hand, they prevent us from facing problems head-on, which we need to do if we are to grow as people. And, as experts will tell us, some of these coping strategies actively harm us and leave us much weaker. Picking up the phone and calling services like Legacy Healing Center is the first step in finding a way to rewire your brain to deal with problems in a healthier way. It’s a scary moment for many of us, but it is an essential one in leaving behind the problems caused by compulsion.
When comfort becomes a cage
At first, an extra glass of wine or a sleeping pill might seem harmless. But tolerance will get you every time. A key plank of addiction is that what was enough yesterday won’t be enough today; you need more to get the same effect. This is the same for every form of addiction: an hour more on the laptop; a stronger sedative; opening a second bottle. And by the time you’ve realized there is a problem, you can already be in danger of the worst possible consequences.
The line between casual use and dependence is usually crossed so quietly you won’t even notice. When you are drinking to cope every evening, suddenly spending an evening without it seems like climbing Everest, and your pleasure centers are telling you that it’s not a problem, it’s just an accessory. If people around you are noticing that you’re indulging in these behaviors, it has already crossed the line; if you’re noticing it yourself, you’re not being overly dramatic – it is time to seek help.
Finding a way out of the maze
Many people will tell you that when they gave up smoking, drinking, or any other risky behavior, they just stopped clean and never went back. That was that. And those people probably don’t realize that during that time they were horrendous to those around them, short-tempered and thin-skinned. The truth is that acknowledging your vulnerability is a key step in getting past it. Speaking to professionals will help you identify the reasons you lost control. Speaking to those close to you is important too – they’ll give you room when you need it and give you more understanding when you’re on edge.
And that professional help is important, because you would be astonished how much stress is shaped by trauma, things you may even have forgotten from the past as well as more recent scars. We don’t process trauma well when we are kids or teenagers, because we don’t have the experience to analyze it; it becomes part of us. This is why talking therapy is a major part of dealing with both stress and the problem behaviors it causes – it teaches us to let go of the things that pull us down.
Hope and long-term healing
Seeing a future without excess stress and the addictions it can feed is hard to begin with. It represents a step into the unknown, and human beings have a tendency to prefer what’s familiar. That first step is going to be hard. You’re going to react against it initially; it’s a defense mechanism and it’s entirely normal. But breaking the stress habit is a way of taking power and a path to a more liberated future. Taking that first step is like stepping on a plane to go somewhere new, or putting on a brand new outfit. You don’t know how it’s going to feel, but you want to find out.
There will be moments of doubt, for sure, and you will repeatedly wonder whether you’re doing the right thing. You are. Dropping the problem coping strategies will cause a reaction because it feels like they’ve been keeping you from losing it, but it is essential to recognize that they are how you lose it – and you can lose a lot more by indulging them. Be open with the people who matter to you and they will help you through. And as you move forward, you’ll realize that all those people who seem to be managing better than you and not falling to their intrusive thoughts are simply curating their image for an audience.
We all struggle to cope with the pace of modern life, work, and everything that comes with them. You’re not failing because you fall into unwise patterns; you’re just trying too hard to do it all alone, and there’s really no need for that. Facing up to the problems is a brave move, but it’s certainly worth it.
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