Modern dating. Swipe left, swipe right, send a text, get ghosted. Repeat. If you believe the internet, dating today is nothing short of a disaster—a hellscape of flakey matches, endless small talk, and the occasional awkward dinner with someone who looks nothing like their profile picture.
But is it really that bad? Or are we just nostalgic for a time that never actually existed?
Has Dating Always Been This Bad? (Spoiler: It Has )
If you ask your parents, they’ll tell you that dating used to be simple. You met someone in your town, courted them over cheap drinks and a trip to the cinema, got married by 22, and lived happily ever after. Sounds pretty romantic, right?
Hmm, we’re not so convinced.
Back then, people settled—and not necessarily for the right reasons. Women had fewer financial opportunities, divorce was taboo, and men were often expected to be the sole providers. Marrying young was more about survival and societal pressure than love.
Also, the dating landscape wasn’t exactly full of options. You married your high school sweetheart, the girl from down the road, or your colleague. Today, your dating pool extends globally, yet somehow, we’re lonelier than ever.
So, has dating gotten worse? Not necessarily. It’s just different. We now have more choice, more independence, and more freedom—but with that freedom comes more ways for things to go horribly wrong.
Why Modern Dating Feels Like a Nightmare
Okay, so maybe dating was never perfect. But that doesn’t mean people aren’t justified in their frustrations today. Here’s why dating in 2024 feels like a full-time job with zero benefits.
1. Dating Apps Have Ruined Everything
On paper, dating apps should make finding love easier. Swipe through thousands of potential matches, meet people outside your social circle, and find someone who actually shares your love for obscure 90s indie films.
In reality?
Apps have turned dating into an algorithm-driven game where everyone is disposable. Conversations fizzle out before they begin, people ghost without explanation, and no one seems to actually want to meet up anymore. Instead of deep connections, we’re drowning in endless options paralysis.
“I matched with a guy who texted me every day for four weeks but never made actual plans. When I finally asked him if he wanted to grab a drink, he just… unmatched me. Like, what was the point? That was four weeks of my life just down the drain.” — Melissa, 29
People now treat dating like online shopping. If someone isn’t perfect, they assume they can just order a better option tomorrow.
2. Hookup Culture Has Replaced Romance
If your idea of a great date involves a candlelit dinner and meaningful conversation, good luck. Hookup culture has taken over, and while casual sex isn’t inherently bad, it has made finding a genuine relationship harder.
Apps make it easy to find someone for a one-night stand, but getting someone to commit to a second date? That’s a whole different challenge.
“I went on a date with a guy who, halfway through dinner, told me he ‘doesn’t really do relationships’ but was ‘down for a vibe.’ A vibe?? Sir, we’re at a steakhouse.” — Chloe, 32
Romance isn’t dead, but it’s definitely got one foot in the grave.
3. People Are More Distracted Than Ever
We live in a world of constant notifications, endless entertainment, and infinite social media scrolling. That means our attention spans—especially for new connections—are shorter than ever.
People are less present on dates, checking their phones instead of engaging. They’re talking to multiple people at once, unsure of who they actually like. And worst of all? Many aren’t even looking for love. They’re just bored.
“I went on a date where the guy kept swiping Tinder under the table. Didn’t even try to hide it. I left before dessert.” — Natalie, 27
With so much distraction, it’s no wonder deep connections are harder to find.
4. Lots of Buildup, Too Little Payoff
Modern dating often feels like an endless cycle of effort with zero reward. You spend weeks texting someone, planning the perfect date, investing time, energy, and money—only for it to fizzle out after one awkward dinner, or worse, to get ghosted the second things start to get serious.
It’s no wonder so many men and women are burnt out on dating. The idea of pouring time into multiple dates, only to realise you have no real chemistry or that they’re still “figuring things out,” is enough to make anyone throw in the towel.
“I see a lot of guys who are just exhausted by the dating scene. They don’t want to spend months texting, planning dates, and hoping it works out. They want guaranteed chemistry, conversation, and an experience that actually feels fulfilling. I can be the girlfriend they want for as long or as little as they wish. Honestly? I get it.”
Sure, hiring an escort isn’t the solution for everyone, but it does provide something dating apps don’t—a connection without the waiting game, the ghosting, or the wasted time.
Is Modern Dating Doomed? So, is dating actually terrible, or are we just bad at it?
The truth? It’s a little bit of both.
Sure, apps have made dating more convenient, but also more impersonal. As for hookup culture, this craze has normalised casual encounters but made commitment harder to find. And of course, people are more distracted and emotionally unavailable than ever, which doesn’t exactly help those in search of romance.
But if we really want to fix modern dating, maybe it’s time to stop blaming the system and start being more intentional. Delete the dating apps if they make you miserable. Be upfront about what you want. Date with purpose, not boredom.
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