The Seven Year Itch is one of the classic movies of the 1950s, a timeless rom-com that cemented Marilyn Monroe’s position as Hollywood’s biggest star of the era. It is also, however, a real-world phenomenon and one that is as just as relevant to couples in the 2020s as it was 70 years ago when the movie was in production.
It is not merely common, it is completely normal to feel a sense of stagnation in a relationship as time goes by. Sexologist and author Gigi Engle told Women’s Health magazine that it is easy to keep things interesting if you and your partner commit to doing so. The trouble is, as John Lennon said, life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans. Work, kids and other commitments can push your relationship with your partner down the priority list. So what does “keeping things interesting” mean? Here are some ideas from experts.
Take time to be alone
It might sound counter-intuitive, but consider this: Being constantly under each other’s feet is not a recipe for romance. Today’s shift towards remote working means many couples are together 24/7. Spending time away from your partner can help keep you both more interested. It also means you can grow, develop and foster your interests. It brings a sense of newness and means you each have a chance to keep learning about one another.
Set aside quality time together
Yes, we mean the famous date night. It sounds a little clichéd, but done right, it can really work wonders. Done right means putting a little imagination into it and not making it just another part of the routine where you go to the same bar or restaurant every Thursday evening, sitting at the same table and eating and drinking the same thing. See what’s on in your area and try an evening at the theater or visit an escape room or if you live near water, how about a sunset cruise?
Shop together for something new in the bedroom
It is easy for life between the sheets to turn humdrum, especially when you live busy lives. It can also be strangely difficult to talk about even when you know each other so completely and intimately. Initiating the discussion is the first and most important step. Once you have opened that door, you can have as much fun together browsing a site like KlinikBondage as you will experimenting with whatever you decide to buy. Yes, there’s also a place for surprises, but shopping together can heighten the fun and anticipation.
Listen to each other
In many ways, this follows on from both of the above. Whether you are at a restaurant or exploring new adventures in the bedroom, the overarching point is that your focus is on each other. Just listening to your partner demonstrates care and interest. Small things can make a big difference. It can be as simple as stopping scrolling through social media and putting down your phone to show you are interested and listening.
Don’t be afraid to get some help
If you have money troubles, you talk to a financial advisor and if you have a bad leg you talk to a doctor. Your relationship is no less important than finances and health, and it can be just as confusing and frightening trying to fix it without expert advice. People are often reluctant to talk to a relationship counsellor because they don’t want to acknowledge there is a problem. But the parallels with finance and health continue, in as much as a difficulty is only likely to escalate if it is ignored. A counsellor or therapist is there to help you work through your feelings, understand the situation and validate your emotions.
The seven-year itch might be a work of fiction, but the phenomenon is real. It is also something that any couple can come through if they have the will and commitment to do so.
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